“streets like a jungle, so call the police”
- hello which service do you require -
Police please
- this is the police -
Great.
You want the fire service, don’t you; the police wont be able to help in the jungle – firemen have got ladders and axes. Don’t call the police.
Blur have reformed. My dad always used to say “a reformed band is like reformed meat – it tastes bad, but you can easily put it in sandwiches”. I don’t know what he meant by that, but he always said it, always. It was like his catchphrase.
“streets like a jungle, so call the police, following the herd, down to Greece…”.
If you’re straight and you’re reading this, you don’t know how easy you’ve got it. "Wooh, yeah, our sexuality has never been demonized, wooh, the victorians loved us." Straight people, straights, have got it easy. There are more offensive terms for straights – breeders being my favourite, “You breeder, you fucking breeder”.
Yeah, easy - if a straight guy wants to find a “mate” - I say mate because that’s what straights do – mate. If a straight guy wants to fine a mate all he need do is go to a place where there are people. Even if there are only ten people in this chosen place, the law of averages dictates that approximately 5+ of them will be straight women; easy, throw himself into a crowd and he’s half way there.
The next stage for getting a mate requires more effort, but not much more; he must first demonstrate that he is youthful, and then exert his masculinity. The youthful part will manifest itself as “saying stupid things”. If a guy says stupid things to a girl she’ll find it endearing – “aw, he’s such a lad, talking about nonsense”.
The exertion of masculinity can be one of two things – farting or lifting objects. Farting, and laughing about farting, shows that a male is all man, for some reason, and lifting things is an obvious demonstration of strength. The battle is won. A woman who has seen a man lifting stuff into, er… somewhere, might think “I know he likes me, but is he just being polite… no, that fart secures it, I’m going home with him. Yes that inane banter, farting and lifting make me think that he’ll be good at putting his penis inside me for quarter of an hour”. Is it quarter of an hour? Heterosexual sex? Fifteen minutes? Quarter of an hour? I don’t know.
The above method of courtship does have its draw backs; many a woman has mistake a greater ape’s natural behaviour for flirtation – with hilarious consequences, and the origin of HIV.
But fair play to heterosexual men. And gay women. They are braver men, and er, men, than I.
I saw a documentary called The Perfect Vagina. Ooo, no. No no no. No, not for me. They showed one image and I was scared. It looked, no offence to women, who are of course “part vagina”, but it looked like a reject 50s B-movie monster.
“Now Showing – Attack of the 50ft Woman – with the supporting feature –
Revenge of the 6ft Vagina, see it bleed, but not die.”
Straight women don’t really have to do anything to be found sexually attractive by men. Being stationary seems to be enough. A guy things to himself “Wow, she hasn’t run away from me, I’m in here”
R B Grange
13/04/2009
09/04/2009
I don't want to be mean to straight people; that's not what I want to do.
Right, so, I don't want to be mean to straight people. At lot of my friends are straights, there's nothing wrong with it, or at least nothing inherently wrong with it.
But it's a bit easy. Granted straight people have their ups and downs, and there is unrequited love in every part of their community, but they've got it easy, so easy. They don't need to go to designated places to meet, everyone presumes correctly about their sexuality, stating it as being "the norm" and jealousy only occurs as a singularity.
When a straight man sees another man going out with an attractive woman, he thinks: "he's done well". When a straight woman sees another woman going out with an attractive man, she thinks: "she's done well". They see half the picture.
What I'm saying is this: the attractive one from The Saturdays and the attractive one from McFly are going out. Oh the unquiet'd rage I have for their happiness, a match made in pop heaven that I am forced to view from Hades. "It's nice that your sexuality doesn't discriminate on the grounds sex"; is it? Is it nice?
Granted, I never had a chance with either Dougie or Frankie, but that's not the point. It's not the point.
RBG
Yeah, I found this info on The Saturday's forum on their website. What's up with that? Don't judge me, you mammals.
But it's a bit easy. Granted straight people have their ups and downs, and there is unrequited love in every part of their community, but they've got it easy, so easy. They don't need to go to designated places to meet, everyone presumes correctly about their sexuality, stating it as being "the norm" and jealousy only occurs as a singularity.
When a straight man sees another man going out with an attractive woman, he thinks: "he's done well". When a straight woman sees another woman going out with an attractive man, she thinks: "she's done well". They see half the picture.
What I'm saying is this: the attractive one from The Saturdays and the attractive one from McFly are going out. Oh the unquiet'd rage I have for their happiness, a match made in pop heaven that I am forced to view from Hades. "It's nice that your sexuality doesn't discriminate on the grounds sex"; is it? Is it nice?
Granted, I never had a chance with either Dougie or Frankie, but that's not the point. It's not the point.
RBG
Yeah, I found this info on The Saturday's forum on their website. What's up with that? Don't judge me, you mammals.
08/04/2009
"...nothing but the rain."
Been watching bits of BSG at the UN
I think it's an appropriate time for me to start putting bits of my Dissertation online, so here's the bit about Star Trek: The Next Generation and Battlestar Galactica.
GROUPS
2001 and the Alien franchise depict deep-space as a context where the Overman may be attained, but Battlestar Galactica (BSG) and Star Trek: The Next Generation (TNG) also give us an analysis of the Nietzschean ideal by in stark contrast to each other and the aforementioned texts.
After the attack on BSG’s Twelve Colonies it is estimated that there are 47,973 survivors. This statistic is vitally important to understanding the whole premise of BSG and how the actions of the individual are the crux of the show. This number is not representative of humanity, it is humanity. These are the human race entire.
BSG can be seen as an alternative depiction of the present. Granted their technology is more advanced in creating robots and faster-than-light travel, but the characters still react to situations as we would now, their zeitgeist is our spirit. For clarity of what this means let us place it along side a similar reimagined series, Star Trek; The Next Generation. To a layman the two series may seem similar; “people in spaceships”, but in BSG the characters are forced into space after their homes have been destroyed. Next Generation has a much more pleasant back-story. After making first contact with alien life hundreds of years before, the world is now a utopian society; no wars, no religion, no money, people “invest in themselves”. The people of TNG are not us, they have got past the hang-ups of our time and explore space with a moral high-ground. It is often mentioned to other races, like the Ferengi, that “we were once like you”, in there love of making a profit. In BSG there is money, the black market, a seemingly stringent class system stemming from place of birth, terrorism, insurgency, civil war and election rigging. Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Starship Enterprise is an Overman, he makes a great hero, but his character is to be aspired for. Admiral William Adama of the Battlestar Galactica lies to his crew and plots to assassinate a superior officer, and yet he is more or less taken to be a good-guy.
By placing the human race outside of its usual context but keeping the ‘old ways’, as it were, Ronald D. Moore (BSG’s creator) creates a platform for reassessing how we behave, what our drive is, and whether or not we are right to presume we are right. BSG does not come up with answers. One does not learn a lesson by the end of an episode, but instead is left with choices and decisions that are to be made.
I include these two shows to illustrate how two similar conceits for television programmes can vastly differ from each other when one set of characters have gone through this Nietzschean transition, and the other have not. It is what makes TNG a utopian life-affirming story and, by the same token, makes BSG a very depressing watch. The characters in BSG are the entirety of the human race, and therefore cannot use deep-space as an empty context, they merely bring their follies with them. With the narrative taking place in enclosed ships characters are forced into such close proximity to each other than the idea of the self is lost and subverted. The crew of the Enterprise do not need to sleep in barracks or suffer from sleep deprivation because they have already surpassed themselves.
R B Grange
I think it's an appropriate time for me to start putting bits of my Dissertation online, so here's the bit about Star Trek: The Next Generation and Battlestar Galactica.
GROUPS
2001 and the Alien franchise depict deep-space as a context where the Overman may be attained, but Battlestar Galactica (BSG) and Star Trek: The Next Generation (TNG) also give us an analysis of the Nietzschean ideal by in stark contrast to each other and the aforementioned texts.
After the attack on BSG’s Twelve Colonies it is estimated that there are 47,973 survivors. This statistic is vitally important to understanding the whole premise of BSG and how the actions of the individual are the crux of the show. This number is not representative of humanity, it is humanity. These are the human race entire.
BSG can be seen as an alternative depiction of the present. Granted their technology is more advanced in creating robots and faster-than-light travel, but the characters still react to situations as we would now, their zeitgeist is our spirit. For clarity of what this means let us place it along side a similar reimagined series, Star Trek; The Next Generation. To a layman the two series may seem similar; “people in spaceships”, but in BSG the characters are forced into space after their homes have been destroyed. Next Generation has a much more pleasant back-story. After making first contact with alien life hundreds of years before, the world is now a utopian society; no wars, no religion, no money, people “invest in themselves”. The people of TNG are not us, they have got past the hang-ups of our time and explore space with a moral high-ground. It is often mentioned to other races, like the Ferengi, that “we were once like you”, in there love of making a profit. In BSG there is money, the black market, a seemingly stringent class system stemming from place of birth, terrorism, insurgency, civil war and election rigging. Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Starship Enterprise is an Overman, he makes a great hero, but his character is to be aspired for. Admiral William Adama of the Battlestar Galactica lies to his crew and plots to assassinate a superior officer, and yet he is more or less taken to be a good-guy.
By placing the human race outside of its usual context but keeping the ‘old ways’, as it were, Ronald D. Moore (BSG’s creator) creates a platform for reassessing how we behave, what our drive is, and whether or not we are right to presume we are right. BSG does not come up with answers. One does not learn a lesson by the end of an episode, but instead is left with choices and decisions that are to be made.
I include these two shows to illustrate how two similar conceits for television programmes can vastly differ from each other when one set of characters have gone through this Nietzschean transition, and the other have not. It is what makes TNG a utopian life-affirming story and, by the same token, makes BSG a very depressing watch. The characters in BSG are the entirety of the human race, and therefore cannot use deep-space as an empty context, they merely bring their follies with them. With the narrative taking place in enclosed ships characters are forced into such close proximity to each other than the idea of the self is lost and subverted. The crew of the Enterprise do not need to sleep in barracks or suffer from sleep deprivation because they have already surpassed themselves.
R B Grange
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